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Struggling through a losing streak


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http://missmuaythai.com/2015/08/18/fight-21/

 

This is a post from 2 fights back. I almost quit after this fight and I just wanted to share my experience of this time with you all.

 

Gemma, I thought this was one of the best fight posts I've ever read. You are so very clear-headed about what was going wrong, and giving insight to all the pressures that a fighter can face. It was kinda incredible. This is just very private stuff. Not that nobody should know about it, but rather than people just don't realize that you can really want to do something, keep telling yourself to do it, but the whole thing can be undermined. Fighters are warriors of the mind, even more than they are of the body. Just a very brilliant and honest telling.

It amazes me that the mind can trick us into feeling that we have NO advantages, when in fact we may be brimming with them. I think this has been a very brave year for you, an amazing year.

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http://missmuaythai.com/2015/08/18/fight-21/

 

This is a post from 2 fights back. I almost quit after this fight and I just wanted to share my experience of this time with you all.

Oh man, Gemma - I know these feelings. Emma and I were talking just before the Queen's Birthday about this "go! Just go!" command and the internal counter of "with what?" I've meditated on this in my own mental training, trying to figure out how to talk to myself in those moments so I can have specifics to get me going (not "go" but "jab" or "more forward and block until I can grab") and then let go and be able to flow. It's so fucking hard. And I have been exactly there with the fighter who is already in your head. Loma is an incredible clincher and because that's my strong point I went nuts losing to her, thinking that the best that I had just wasn't enough for her skill. As if that thought helps me at all.

I'm glad you got out of that terrible head space, but despite how awful it is to experience it's also good that it allowed you to have some time with your family and reawaken your drive. Thank you for this honest blog post. Thank God it's not just you, or just me, or just any one of us.

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Gemma, I thought this was one of the best fight posts I've ever read. You are so very clear-headed about what was going wrong, and giving insight to all the pressures that a fighter can face. It was kinda incredible. This is just very private stuff. Not that nobody should know about it, but rather than people just don't realize that you can really want to do something, keep telling yourself to do it, but the whole thing can be undermined. Fighters are warriors of the mind, even more than they are of the body. Just a very brilliant and honest telling.

It amazes me that the mind can trick us into feeling that we have NO advantages, when in fact we may be brimming with them. I think this has been a very brave year for you, an amazing year.

 

Thank you so much for this feedback. I am thrilled to hear this post was received so well. It's not always easy bearing your darkest moments to the world but I want to be transparent in my journey, not only as therapy for myself, but so others don't feel alone in their own journeys. There are big things to come. I can feel it!

 

 

 

Oh man, Gemma - I know these feelings. Emma and I were talking just before the Queen's Birthday about this "go! Just go!" command and the internal counter of "with what?" I've meditated on this in my own mental training, trying to figure out how to talk to myself in those moments so I can have specifics to get me going (not "go" but "jab" or "more forward and block until I can grab") and then let go and be able to flow. It's so fucking hard. And I have been exactly there with the fighter who is already in your head. Loma is an incredible clincher and because that's my strong point I went nuts losing to her, thinking that the best that I had just wasn't enough for her skill. As if that thought helps me at all.

I'm glad you got out of that terrible head space, but despite how awful it is to experience it's also good that it allowed you to have some time with your family and reawaken your drive. Thank you for this honest blog post. Thank God it's not just you, or just me, or just any one of us.

That damned internal dictation! I feel you! Some times I have to tell myself to pull the trigger! Just go!

 

I wanted to write a separate post about my losing streak but this was better. Pinpointing that moment I wanted to hang up my gloves. As always, thank you for your feedback and support!

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