[Backing up in Sparring]

My coach will have us do drills strictly within each other's space/pocket. No clinch, but just punches and defense, and it's okay to back up every now and again, but the goal is to get into the other person's space and stay there.

[Developing Your Style]

I haven't fought yet (something I'm working towards). But I do know that style is something I've had a lot to think about. I'm short (5'3) and often only work with tall people. And my body type probably won't allow me to get down very much in weight, so I'm thinking most potential people will probably be significantly taller than me. But, despite knowing this, I still for like the first two years of learning muay thai would constantly back up, and wait for my opponent to strike first. This last year however after changing gyms and kind of opening up myself more to new concepts and ideas, I've become a little more aggressive with getting into people's space. I still struggle with it, and I think that's more due to apprehension and hesitation-I'm wary of stepping into someone's space, and of falling for a feint. But when I do get into someone's space, I am aggressive, and that's new for me.  

I guess what I'm trying to say is that style for me appears to be fluid, and changes as I change. And honestly, if it hadn't of been for Sylvie's article about styles, I never would have thought about it. I just thought I was timid and didn't know what the hell I was doing for the longest time.

As for the fight footage, I'd get it if I were you, especially if you didn't have someone else record you. You might see things you didn't realize you were doing.

[What makes you happy during sparring/fighting?]

What makes me happy during sparring is when I can feel the progress that has been made, both mentally and physically. I've been off and on practicing muay thai for three years, but the last six months has noted more progress than I recall, especially mentally. Before I had a habit of just kind of standing and waiting, but now I feel more confident pursuing my partner and moving forward, and less moving backwards. Also makes me happy when I can execute a technique that I previously struggled with (ie hooks.. I struggle getting into a person's space to actually throw an effective hook).

[Binge eating]

I second what NewThai suggested. I have found the same thing in the past.. not eating enough on the good days and binging hard to.. for lack of a better word.. compensate by overeating the bad days. It's also helped to plan out my meals and food prep. I'm less likely to eat out/binge eat if I know I'm supposed to eat something that's already prepared.

[Thinking About Style - Things I'm Working On]

Nongki energy.. I tried googling that but didn't find anything?

[New gym.. sort of a rant]

Well, I went back.

 

The difference was astounding. Idk how exactly I ended up in the MMA style class instead of the striking class.. not even really sure they were going to have a striking class.. still figuring that out but that's beside the point. The point being that I went back and it was completely different. I've talked to a few people about this to kind of think out loud why I struggled so much with last weeks class and have come up with a few explanations. The largest explanation being that I was probably giving myself too high a threshold and expectation, and just ended up letting myself down. The next, and while not as large but still pretty important, is that one of the instructors and the way he treated me and his personality was reminiscent of my first coach.. the one who I did not in the end have a good experience with.. and an ex of mine. I think it really fucked with my head. Like, really fucked with my head. I'm glad I went back. Still going to give it another couple of go's I think before I fully commit to it though.

[Thinking About Style - Things I'm Working On]

I'm still, if not even more so, a counter striker. Now I just need to learn how to effectively and appropriately utilize that natural instinct to wait and react to whatever is being thrown at me.

[New gym.. sort of a rant]

I recently moved to a new area, and there is only one gym here that offers Muay Thai. The next nearest gym is an hour to an hour and a half away, and that's my old gym that I stopped going to for several reasons (of which a few are no longer issues, but where old ones fade new ones pop up). So I decided to try this gym near me and see how it goes. Right? Right.

 

I messed up the first time I went and accidentally showed up for BJJ. I stayed anyways because in my very limited experience BJJ was pretty fun. The people seemed good. The instructions pretty clear. People willing to help explain a little more in detail if something didn't feel right, etc. I thought that would have been a good indicator for how the other class would be. Certainly eased the incredible amount of anxiety I had managed to build up over trying a new gym.

 

So tonight was my second attempt at attending their Muay Thai class. And there was no clear time as to when class started. No clear idea who the instructor was going to be. No clear anything. The instructions weren't clear. I asked. And tried. I tried to take my time to learn and slow everything down a bit, and they became frustrated with me because I wasn't "flowing". I felt like I was flowing. They kept interrupting my attempts. Almost felt like I was being snapped at. Not instructed. Not taught. And it was a similar feeling as to what I experienced and eventually led me to stop attending my last gym. As I type this I'm realizing that.

 

I didn't voice my concerns. I didn't ask them to stop. I didn't tell them that I wasn't getting it. I didn't communicate. I see that. Now. I don't know if that's normally how a class is conducted. I don't know who all of the instructors are. There are a lot of unknowns and I recognize that that's no ones fault in particular. Yes there are things I could have done differently, and yes there are things they could have done differently.

 

Regarding the content of the class.. it was *soooo* different than other Muay Thai classes I've done. I can't currently figure out how to describe why it was so different. If I manage to figure that out I'll update this but as of right now.. it just felt so uncomfortable.

 

I can't begin to explain how much learning and practicing Muay Thai means to me, but do I want to try this place again? And if I go and its still not what I need out of a gym, do I continue to go out of sheer need to practice somewhere despite it not being what I need? Or do I try and do it on my own? (That doesn't seem likely.. I struggle enough to motivate myself to get out of bed most days.) or do I try and figure out how to financially make a commute to a gym I purposefully left to try and get practice in?

 

At what point does my level of discomfort become regressive instead of progressive? Is there such a thing?

 

I've tried to talk to and explain this to my family. But they don't get it. I don't know if I'm looking for answers or insight or what. Any input welcome.

[Thinking About Style - Things I'm Working On]

Since it's right near two years later, wondered if anyone has noticed a change in their style and how they approach opponents/partners? Has time made you stronger or more confident in a certain style or has it changed for you? Just curious.