It’s four days after my 24th fight and I filmed a video journal update out at the Chiang Mai University fields where I like to do sprints. It’s been a rough four days, emotionally speaking. Just one of those things that is mitigated by winning: not having to deal with all the emotional stress and circular blaming involved in a loss.
One of my coaches advised me to stop putting my “stuff” online and it bummed me out because it’s such impersonal advice from someone to whom I offer a great deal of my personal energy. It didn’t even really come from him, as he spends maybe a few hours per month online answering emails and probably never has seen anything I put online. He heard it from someone else and that person doesn’t even know how much I put online, that it’s systematic and has weight, not just a manic blind release into the ether.
My motivations should not be in question. I work hard, I listen to advice, acknowledge my weaknesses and actually ask my trainers what they want for me to work on – and then I work on it. I fight more often than anyone else and I train more often than anyone else, so what I do with my experience outside of the context of the gym is really nobody’s business but mine… and yours. Whatever – the “stuff” stays online; I don’t put it here for folks who don’t like it anyway.
